Trust in Yourself or trust in others or trust in God
Genesis 32 Now Jacob went on his way, and the angels of God met him. 2 Then Jacob said when he saw them, “This is God’s [a]camp.” So he named that place [b]Mahanaim.
24 Then Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him until the [h]breaking of dawn. 25 And he saw that he had not prevailed against him, so he touched the socket of his thigh; and so the socket of Jacob’s thigh was dislocated while he wrestled with him. 26 Then he said, “Let me go, for the dawn is [i]breaking.” But he said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” 27 So he said to him, “What is your name?” And he said, “Jacob.” 28 Then He said, “Your name shall no longer be Jacob, but [j]Israel; for you have striven with God and with men and have prevailed.”
We are drawing the story of Jacob to a close and so I wanted to home in on a central truth that we get from his life. There are a couple of verses that express that truth well.
Psalm 20:7 Some boast in chariots and some in horses, But we will boast in the name of Yahweh, our God.
Psalm 33: The king is not saved by a
mighty army; A warrior is not delivered by great strength.
17 A horse is a false hope for
salvation; Nor does it provide escape to anyone by its great strength.
18 Behold, the eye of Yahweh is on those who fear Him, On those who wait for His lovingkindness,
Jacob’s life is an illustration of the maxim that we write on all our coinage; In God we trust.
Jacob lived 147 years. And it wasn’t until his later years that he learned the truth that God was the only sure thing in life.
Genesis 47: 7 Then Joseph brought his father Jacob and stood him before Pharaoh; and Jacob blessed Pharaoh. 8 And Pharaoh said to Jacob, “How many are the days of the years of your life?” 9 So Jacob said to Pharaoh, “The days of the years of my sojourning are [e]130; few and evil have been the days of the years of my life, and they have not [f]attained to the days of the years [g]that my fathers lived during the days of their sojourning.”
He is summarizing his life as being few and evil of days. And I think that his life went that way because he spent much of his life trusting in everything and everybody but God. He tried to build his own future on his own cleverness, conniving and schemes and it resulted in a very strained relationship with his father, brother, and father-in-law. Throughout his life he developed a distrust of the closest people around him. His own children turned out as hateful, jealous, and violent people.
So, who can you trust? God.
I. Trust in Others
Sometimes when we are children, if we are raised in good homes, we trust everyone. We have no experience with bad people, so we think everyone is good. That’s why parents try to train their kids not to go with strangers or follow them to get candy. But, as we age, we discover that people can’t be trusted. We become watchful and leery. Even those who we do somewhat trust, we come to realize that they are flawed and sinful people. I read a little story that illustrates that learning process.
Years ago, Monroe Parker was traveling through South Alabama on one of those hot, sultry Alabama days. He stopped at a watermelon stand, picked out a watermelon, and asked the proprietor how much it cost. "It's $1.10," he replied. Parker dug into his pocket, found only a bill and said, "All I have is a dollar." "That's ok," the proprietor said, "I'll trust you for it." "Well, that's mighty nice of you," Parker responded, and picking up the watermelon, started to leave. "Hey, where are you going?" the man behind the counter demanded. "I'm going outside to eat my watermelon." "But you forgot to give me the dollar!" "You said you would trust me for it," Parker called back. "Yeah, but I meant I would trust you for the dime, not for the dollar!"
Haddon Robinson.
We learn through our experiences that there are some that I can give a dollar’s worth of trust, others I can only give a dimes worth of trust, and to others we will say, “Get off my porch!”
Who can you trust? God
As we pick up with our story of Jacob, he has left home because he has a nutty family. Now, Jacob is no saint. But his family is the picture of dysfunction. It has gotten so bad that he now has to leave home to get away from a brother who wants to kill him. Last time, we left him journeying 450 miles to his mother’s family to escape Esau’s wrath, and to get a wife.
And along the way, God gives him a vision, trying to stress the point with him, that regardless of his family, where he has been, or where he is going, that he should put his trust in God. Let’s just read that.
Genesis 28: 10 Then Jacob departed from Beersheba and went toward Haran. 11 And he reached [c]a certain place and spent the night there because the sun had set; and he took one of the stones of the place and put it [d]under his head and lay down in that place. 12 Then he had a dream, and behold, a [e]ladder stood on the earth with its top touching heaven; and behold, the angels of God were ascending and descending on it. 13 And behold, Yahweh stood [f]above it and said, “I am Yahweh, the God of your father Abraham and the God of Isaac; the land on which you lie, I will give it to you and to your seed. 14 And your seed will also be like the dust of the earth, and you will [g]spread out to the west and to the east and to the north and to the south; and in you and in your seed all the families of the earth shall be blessed. 15 Behold, I am with you and will keep you wherever you go. And I will bring you back to this land; for I will not forsake you until I have done what I have [h]promised you.”
After that assurance from God, he continues his journey. He makes it there, and he finds his uncle Laban’s family.
He arrives at his destination Paddan-Aram, after a long and arduous journey and comes to a well. He begins inquiring about Laban and his family. He is told that they are well, and that Laban’s daughter happened to be coming at that moment to water her father’s sheep. He introduces himself to her, let’s her know that he’s family.
11 Then Jacob kissed Rachel and lifted his voice and wept. 12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was a [b]relative of her father and that he was Rebekah’s son, and she ran and told her father. 13 So it happened that when Laban heard the report of Jacob his sister’s son, he ran to meet him, and he embraced him and kissed him and brought him to his house. Then he recounted to Laban all these things. 14 And Laban said to him, “Surely you are my bone and my flesh.” And he stayed with him one month.
He falls in love with Rachel, Laban’s younger daughter. He wants to marry her. It would seem that now he is in a place, and among a people that he can trust, where he can build a life. He was mistaken. Laban can’t be trusted. He is sweet as honey on the outside, but a swindler on the inside. Truthfully, Jacob has met his match. Jacob is there for a month. What is he doing for a month? Laban is a shepherd. We know that because Jacob met Rachel at a well where she was to water her father’s flock. Jacob was also a shepherd. So, the most likely scenario is that, in that month, he starts doing what he knows how to do, to be a good guest. He gets up in the morning and helps shepherd the flock. This would not only be natural for him, it would also allow him to be near to Rachel, who is also apparently involved in caring for the sheep.
So, I think, in this month, Laban starts noticing some things. First, he notes that Jacob is a self-starting worker and that he can be trusted. And Laban likes the idea of the free labor. The second thing he notices is that Jacob knows what he is doing. Things are going better with Jacob there than before. And third, he notices that Jacob likes Rachel. So, I think the wheels start turning in his scheming brain. After a month he says this to Jacob.
15 Then Laban said to Jacob, “Because you are my [c]relative, should you therefore serve me for nothing? Tell me, what shall your wages be?” 16 Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. 17 And Leah’s eyes were weak, but Rachel was beautiful in form and beautiful in appearance. 18 Now Jacob loved Rachel, so he said, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” 19 And Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than to give her to another man; stay with me.” 20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they were in his sight but a few days because of his love for her.
Now let’s stop here for a moment because this seems strange to us. Because Laban is basically selling his daughter to Jacob. Though we find this reprehensible, we need to remember that these were the customs of that time. In some cultures, the bride brought a dowry into the new husband’s home, but in others, certain gifts were expected from the prospective groom to the bride’s family.
And Jacob hasn’t come with anything worth giving as a gift. All he has is his skill and labor as a shepherd. So, he agrees to serve Laban for seven years in order to get Rachel as a wife. Well so far everything seems to be going well. Jacob is going to get the wife he was sent for, and he is staying away from home for enough time for Esau to cool off. So, seven years go by and it seems like nothing to Jacob
21 Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in to her.” 22 And Laban gathered all the men of the place and made a feast. 23 Now it happened in the evening that he took his daughter Leah and brought her to him; and Jacob went in to her. 24 Laban also gave his servant-woman Zilpah to his daughter Leah as a servant-woman. 25 Now it happened in the morning that, behold, it was Leah! And he said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Was it not for Rachel that I served with you? Why then have you deceived me?”
Laban has pulled the old switcheroo. He switched Leah for Rachel. Why would he do that? Well, it tells us that Leah was the older sister, but she was less attractive than her younger sister. Maybe she was getting to an age where he’s concerned that no man will ever want her, and he will have her as a dependent forever. Then there is a second likely reason. His seven-year labor contract with Jacob is almost up. By now, it’s possible that Jacob has given just a little information about why he is there. So, Laban may be aware that Jacob’s ultimate plan is to get a wife and return home. But, as Laban would say later, he is prospering while Jacob is there. He notices that God’s blessing is on Jacob in whatever he does. So he wants Jacob to stay longer. So he contrives this scheme do get him to stay longer.
But how did this happen? Well, brides were often presented to the new husband heavily veiled and in layers of clothing. Their cultures also segregated men and women more than ours so that even the party beforehand may have had men over here, women over there. You also can’t discount the fact that there was likely a lot of drinking. Then, as the evening turned to night, Laban would have escorted his daughter Leah, fully covered, to Jacob’s dark tent.
Jacob had to learn again that people can’t be trusted. Some people pursue evil, some people are just incapable of more than what they are. And Laban is no better.
Now, I had an aha moment when I read this story this time. Maybe I’m alone in this, but I never thought about how poetic the justice is here. How did Jacob get the birthright away from his brother Esau? He struck a bargain with Esau for it. Bowl of beans for birthright. Laban struck a bargain with Jacob; Rachel for 7 years labor. How did Jacob steal the blessing from his father Isaac? He dressed up like his brother Esau. He impersonated his brother to get the blessing. How did Laban get Jacob to marry Leah, and get seven more years of labor out of Jacob? He dressed Leah up as her sister.
Jacob got what he gave. Jacob met a man in Laban who was a reflection of himself.
So, the next morning Jacob protests to Laban that he was given the wrong sister. And this is Laban’s response.
26 But Laban said, “It is not [d]the practice in our place to give the younger before the firstborn. 27 Fulfill the week of this one, and we will give you the other also for the service which you shall serve with me for another seven years.”
Jacob gives Laban seven more years of labor so that he can have Rachel as wife. Well, Laban’s dishonesty is not over. But we also often have to learn that people can only be trusted as far as you can throw them. There are too many mitigating factors for us to put total trust in any person. Why can we trust God, because He is omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent and holy. He knows every relevant detail of your circumstance, He has all power, so He can do anything to change circumstances. He is present everywhere. And He is perfectly holy just and good, so we know His solutions will be for our good. There is no person, or group of people that you can say that about.
Psalm 146:3 Do not trust in princes, In mortal man, in whom there is no salvation.
Psalm 118:8 It is better to take refuge in the Lord Than to trust in man.
Micah 7:5 Do not trust in a neighbor; Do not have confidence in a friend. From her who lies in your bosom Guard your lips.
II. Trust in Yourself
Jacob, from his earliest years, was trying to build a kingdom for himself. His birth illustrated that desire. His twin brother is leaving the birth canal first, and he is seen grasping on to his brother’s heal as though to pull his brother back and thrust himself forward to be the first born. That’s how he got his name; Jacob, or supplanter.
Later, when they are older, his brother comes in from the field famished and weak from hunting and Jacob was cooking a stew of lentils. Esau asked for some of the food. Jacob used the opportunity to advance himself. He offered to trade the food for Esau’s familial rights as firstborn son. And Esau did it.
Later Jacob, along with his mother conspire to take away the blessing that his father Isaac wanted to give to Esau. His mother disguised him as Esau to fool Isaac and took the blessing.
And that wasn’t the end of Jacob working to advance himself. Today we came to the story of Laban, who became Jacob’s father-in-law. He had come to his uncle Laban who had two daughters. And through Laban’s scheming Jacob ends up working for Laban for 14 years and married to both of Laban’s daughters. Incidentally, each of the girls also had a female servant called a handmaiden, and they end up becoming Jacob’s concubines. But that’s another story. But lest we get to caught up in the injustice against Jacob, we need to remember that he is no different than his father-in-law. He is scheming to advance himself even as Laban was scheming. So, this is what happened. Jacob is employed by his father-in-law as a shepherd for 14 years to get two wives.
But Jacob is not content to just be an employee. He wants to be the owner. He has now got two wives and two concubines and 11 sons and a daughter by those women. But he has nothing else. His 14 years of service is over. He has been dupped by Laban into that service. He’s now ready to go home.
Genesis 30: 25 Now it happened when Rachel had borne Joseph, that Jacob said to Laban, “Send me away, that I may go to my own place and to my own land. 26 Give me my wives and my children for whom I have served you, and let me go; for you yourself know my service which I have [n]rendered you.”
He tells his father-in-law, “we’re outa here.” But Laban doesn’t want him to leave.
27 But Laban said to him, “If now I have found favor in your sight, stay with me; I have interpreted an omen that Yahweh has blessed me on your account.”
He had observed over these 14 years that his prosperity increased while Jacob worked for him. And he sees that it is the result of Jacob’s hard work, fairness, and the blessing of God. This begs the question as to why he wasn’t prospering before Jacob came. It is likely that he and his sons were not hard-working, and fair, that they did not honor God so that God would bless their work.
28 And he continued to say, “Name me your wages, and I will give it.” 29 But he said to him, “You yourself know how I have served you and how your livestock have [o]fared with me. 30 For you had little before [p]I came, but it has spread out to a multitude, and Yahweh has blessed you [q]at every step of mine. But now, when shall I provide for my own household also?” 31 So he said, “What shall I give you?” And Jacob said, “You shall not give me anything. If you will do this one thing for me, I will again pasture and keep your flock: 32 let me pass through your entire flock today, removing from there every speckled and spotted sheep and every black [r]one among the lambs and the spotted and speckled among the goats; and such shall be my wages. 33 So my righteousness will answer for me later, when you come concerning my [s]wages. Every one that is not speckled and spotted among the goats and black among the lambs, if found with me, will be considered stolen.” 34 And Laban said, “Behold, [t]let it be according to your word.”
Well, what in the world is Jacob doing? A better question would be, who is he trusting? This is another scheme. He is working to advance himself. I don’t think that Jacob was all that anxious to go home. He just knows that Laban can’t be trusted and that his obligation to him is ended. And if he is going to stay he had better negotiate a better deal than he did the first time. So he comes up with a plan for self-advancement.
It appears from the story that Laban has put all of his flock under Jacob’s control. Jacob can care for them in any way that he chooses. Now, the text doesn’t tell us what Jacob is thinking, but once Laban makes this agreement Jacob goes to work to take away Laban’s flock. He relies on his understanding of genetics. It’s an interesting story what he does, some of it we understand to simply be rules for breeding and cross-breeding. Now, in that area, and in that time, most of the goats born would be solid black or brown, and most of the sheep would be solid white. A minority would have spots, speckles or stripes. So, he isolates all the speckled, spotted and black three days journey from the solid colored. He puts the speckled, spotted and striped under the care of his sons. That leaves the solid colored with him. Now he does some superstitious things that he thinks will cause the solid colored to bear more speckled and spotted lambs. And every time one is born, he removes it and sends it to his sons. But he also does some basic sensible breeding. He removes weaker sheep from his flock.
But he is conniving. He is scheming. He is taking advantage of the fact that his father-in-law entered into the agreement because he simply counted how many solid versus spotted there were and thought he was better the better end of the deal. In the end, Jacob’s plan was successful. He oversaw Laban’s flock for 6 more years and increased his own flock while depleting Laban’s. But wasn’t ultimately his scheming he should have trusted. He should have trusted God. Listen to how this arrangement concludes.
Genesis 31: Then [a]Jacob heard the words of Laban’s sons, saying, “Jacob has taken away all that belonged to our father, and from what belonged to our father he has made all this [b]wealth.” 2 And Jacob saw the face of Laban, and behold, it was not friendly toward him as formerly. 3 Then Yahweh said to Jacob, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your kin, and I will be with you.” 4 So Jacob sent and called Rachel and Leah to his flock in the field, 5 and he said to them, “I see your father’s face, that it is not friendly toward me as formerly, but the God of my father has been with me. 6 You also know that I have served your father with all my power. 7 Yet your father has cheated me and changed my wages ten times; however, God did not allow him to harm me. 8 If he spoke thus, ‘The speckled shall be your wages,’ then all the flock bore speckled; and if he spoke thus, ‘The striped shall be your wages,’ then all the flock bore striped. 9 Thus God has delivered your father’s livestock and given them to me. 10 Now it happened at the time when the flock were [c]mating that I lifted up my eyes and saw in a dream, and behold, the male goats which were [d]mating were striped, speckled, and mottled. 11 Then the angel of God said to me in the dream, ‘Jacob,’ and I said, ‘Here I am.’ 12 He said, ‘Lift up now your eyes and see that all the male goats which are [e]mating are striped, speckled, and mottled; for I have seen all that Laban has been doing to you. 13 I am the God of Bethel, where you anointed a pillar, where you made a vow to Me; now arise, [f]leave this land, and return to the land of your kin.’”
It was God who made his flock increase. And it took this contention with Laban for him to learn that. Because regardless of all his scheming, Laban kept changing the terms of the agreement. Jacob finally realizes that if it weren’t for God working for him, Laban would have sent him away with nothing.
You can’t put your trust in yourself and your schemes. But sometimes we won’t learn that truth until we have exhausted all of our own strength. It is true what they say in many 12 step programs that most people will not seek help until they have hit the bottom of their own resources.
Dr. Andrew Bonar told me how, in the Highlands of Scotland, a sheep would often wander off into the rocks and get into places that they couldn't get out of. The grass on these mountains is very sweet and the sheep like it, and they will jump down ten or twelve feet, and then they can't jump back again, and the shepherd hears them bleating in distress. They may be there for days, until they have eaten all the grass. The shepherd will wait until they are so faint they cannot stand, and then they will put a rope around him, and he will go over and pull that sheep up out of the jaws of death. "Why don't they go down there when the sheep first gets there?" I asked. "Ah!" He said, "they are so very foolish they would dash right over the precipice and be killed if they did!" And that is the way with men; they won't go back to God till they have no friends and have lost everything. If you are a wanderer I tell you that the Good Shepherd will bring you back the moment you have given up trying to save yourself and are willing to let Him save you His own way.
Moody's Anecdotes, pp. 70-71.
So, what is the lesson of Jacob’s life? Trust in God.